Aug 25, 2009

A million middle fingers.

Okay, I feel kind of bad for having not posted anything in quite a few days. I have officially moved in to BSC. It is extremely weird, fun, terrifying and excited. I'm really ready for classes to start. This orientation process has dragged out quite sufficiently. The have planned events in the evenings that are awkward attempts to get people to meet one another... who would have thought square dancing would be a bonding experience? Not me. I ended up going to the ATO house and watching them play beer pong. Classy. I did see Mike Popwell though. Its been a super long time. He was trashed. But it was cute. And it was nice hanging out with people who have been here and dont seem so freaking judgmental. Maybe that is not the right word. Because I know that everyone is nervous-ish.
I dont feel like I fit in very well with the girls in CD... and the more time I spend with Grace, the more different I see we are. I dont know... It just makes me doubt my ability to make friends or be comfortable in any social situation. Its not that I dont want to meet people. I am just too freaking self-conscious to act normal. I dont even think that makes sense. To sum in up, I just feel misplaced. Like, I dont fit in here... I havent found where I need to be. And I truly hope that it gets better. I think that once I start making friends with the people in my classes it will get much better. Or maybe college isnt the place for me either.
I just dont feel like I belong.

No comments:

Post a Comment